2. And the sign says "Thank You Very Much for Not Smoking." My only sign says, "I'm sorry, I'm smokin'."
3. I Am the Last of the Famous International Playboys.
4. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. Put them out for me.
5. One year, my dad promised to make me one of those Ghostbusters proton pack thingies. I was disappointed when it didn't shoot any wavy beams of ghost-gripping power. To express my disappointment, I crossed the streams.
6. What the hell made Michael Jackson write Thriller, anyway? I think he drugged and trapped some kids in a creeped-out part of his house and tortured them - a la Saw (which I haven't seen yet.) I can just hear the poor kid now. "He doesn't want us to saw through the sheets. He wants us to saw through OUR JAMMIES!"
7. Ever have Monster Mash? Wolfman makes the best base for the mash. Thick, supportive consistency. Dracula is too gamey. Frankenstein's Monster tastes kind of, well, spoiled. I like to put sour cream and cheddar cheese in mine.
8. Not to get all pedantic on your asses, but World, can't we get this right for once? FRANKENSTEIN was the doctor who created the monster. FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER is the monster that everybody likes to dress up as on Halloween. Got it. THE MONSTER IS NOT FRANKENSTEIN!!!!!
9. Wolfman's got nards!
10. One of my favorite Halloween traditions as a teeny-bopper was to get a bunch of folks together and watch Rocky Horror. Yes, I know this is dorky, but I got to see a lot of hot girls dress up in fishnets. Or were those guys? I don't know anymore.
11. Hey kids, let's get a little inventive this year, shall we. Ostrich eggs this time.
12. My other favorite thing about Halloween is that all the cable movie stations show all the old, classic horror films out there. So far I've watched the Amityville Horror trilogy, Army of Darkness (not horror, but still), and Sunday I have the 21 Hour Halloween movie fest on AMC, at least, I think it's on AMC. (Side note, if you haven't seen it, rent Snoop Dogg's "Bones" flick. Good, good times for Halloween.
