The Wrong Squid: hot weiners Collin left out a couple of things about Rhode Island that we've discussed. The first is my theory on the "New York System" of hot weiner preparation. My feeling is that they have to be boiled in toilet water (preferably from the Port Authority toilets), or something involving Derek Jeters' ass. (As an aside, a friend of mine tells me the Boston System is when you cook hot dogs in toilet water and then shove them up Jeter's ass. I will now prepare all weiners this way.)
Second, when you move to a new place with stupid food names, it provides a great opportunity to just make up new foods. Sure, you could have a drink called an "armoire" to go along with the whole cabinet thing, but that's easy. I have been telling people that the best thing about Rhode Island is the "pudding sack," which is just a plastic bag full of pudding. It didn't work on my coworkers who are from Rhode Island, but I had a few others going for a while. So if you hear me talking about the pudding sack, back me up.
Providence is cool because you can use the prefix "Pro" to describe local things. The Providence police are the "Pro po," Providence prostitutes can be either "Pro pros" or "Pro hoes," Providence gay dudes are "Pro 'mos." You get the idea.
Oh, and the local farm league hockey team, the Providence Bruins, is called the P Bruins. We were discussing this at work, and as I took a big sip of water, I commented, "I've got some pee brewin'." Their ads also proclaim that Providence is where pride begins with P. So, either "no shit," or, "huh?"
