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Post-Modern Drunk: The Absolute Worst People in The World
The Absolute Worst People in The World are the people who talk like they're the worst people in the world. They're the type of people who tell you something mildly salacious about one of their friends and say, "I'm terrible. I'm so awful. Oh, I'm such a bitch!" Presumably for talking about someone behind their back.

They have cupcakes and go against their diets and say, "Oh, I'm so evil." If anyone called anyone a "rebel" anymore, they would call themselves that.

They run for president and call themselves a "maverick" while parroting their parties line and abandoning all the slightly independent positions they held in the past.

You can take their self-nominated descriptions about as seriously as Bugs Bunny saying, "Ain't I a stinker?"

No, you are not. You are mildly annoying, at best.

Hitler was evil. Pol Pot, he was evil. Jared Loughner, he is evil. Unless you're the Westboro Baptist Church, maybe you should hold back on self-applying judgments on how terrible you are. Unless you're the Black Eyed Peas evaluating your Superbowl Performance in the cold light of day after your return trip from Tron, you don't need to sit and say, "Aren't I just terrible?"

You really are terrible.

Just not in the bad boy way that you think.

comments[2]  |   2/8/2011  |  perma-link

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