Post-Modern Drunk: Requiem for a Random Ten
Occasionally I'm asked...okay, I'm lying. No one's actually asked, but it's conceivable that some of you have wondered this in passing: what happened to the Friday Random Ten? It's been precisely two months since the last one. Well, here's the truth.

I'm out of music.

I didn't want to admit it back in March, but those 18 Random Tens completely used up all 180 songs I own, and as I no longer care about music, I will not be getting anymore.

Not that I ever truly cared about music. I just wanted to look cool for all the hipsters reading happyrobot and judging us based on the obscurity of our tastes. Remember, it's what you like, not what you are like, that matters.

Also, you may have noticed that I haven't done an alcohol review for half a year. That's because I've quit drinking.

No. Wait. That's because I quit drinking new things. I no longer want to experience new things--I just want to collapse in on myself and enjoy the things I enjoy, becoming more cloistered and bitter and set in my ways as I grow older. I'm no longer going to try to make new friends, either. So, friends, you're it! If you leave me now, you'll take away the biggest part of me (woooo ooooh noooooo, baby please don't go!). And I'd be alone. So alone.

Don't do it. Don't do it baby. I just got to have you by my side!

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