Post-Modern Drunk: The Love You Have, Not the Love You Deserve
 The New York Post has reported that the inspiration for Adele's Grammy winning album 21 is an aspiring musician and actor who goes by the name of Slinky Sunbeam, who met Adele and started dating her after she became famous for her previous album, 19. The NY Post, with the Post's customary focus on properly sourcing and confirming their stories, just cites a "friend of the singer" in the article. This friend allegedly says that Slinky "is a seriously good-looking guy. He has a great body and likes to wear vests to show it off. And he has this crazy hair which reminds me of Jimi Hendrix."

I'll just repeat that. He likes to wear vests to show it off. Love is a many splendoured thing, but vests? What a putz. ANyway, their relationship failed when Slinky got involved with a Burberry model with the even more unlikely name of Morwenna Lytton Cobbold. Can we just all take a moment and appreciate that name. I want Morwenna Lytton Cobbold to date Benedict Cumberbatch. And then to marry and hyphenate their names.

Slinky, of course, is not remotely the first muse to be completely and utterly unworthy of the art they inspire in someone who is actually talented and not named "Slinky." There is a proud tradition of artists inspired by unworthy people.

For instance:
• Nancy Spungen
• Julian Lennon
• Sara Dylan
• Pattie Boyd
• Joan Baez
• Edie Sedgwick
• Leigh Limon
• Zelda Fitzgerald
• Zelda (of Hyrule)

My friend Brian would also add Dave Coulier, and Mia Farrow's sister here, among others, while my girlfriend pointed out that Eminem's ex-ex-girlfriend Kim also didn't get quite the art she deserved from him.

These things just happen. I've had people in my life who, were I capable of creating great art, I would have done my best to create great art in their name, even though they weren't remotely worth it and in fact I didn't actually like them very much or have much in common with them, even. (To be clear, I never dated any of these people--this is not a passive-aggressive comment aimed at any ex-girlfriend or anything like that). You go to love with the girls you have, not the ones you should have.

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an ellipsis in time				tattoos i would have gotten at various ages

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